Wednesday, 18 May 2011

The Morning Paper (s)


Every morning, standing between the “Please keep our City Clean” signs and the zillion recycling bins, there are no less than three people waving free newspapers in my face. The papers are practically stuffed on your person even when shaking your head “non merci”. I never make eye contact with these people anymore, who, after all, are only doing their jobs. I don't want these papers, I don't read these papers.  But….lots and lots and LOTS of people take them only to drop them like they’re dirty diapers as soon as they’re out of sight.

Some people, however, actually get as far as carrying them onto the metro car and pass the time reading whatever it is they’re selling.

The other day a student was sitting on the metro flipping through her paper and when she arrived at her stop, dropped the paper on the seat before exiting. She had no idea a David Suzuki elf was sitting beside her.

HEY” he shouted, and pointed to her paper.

She looked at him briefly and turned her head. Mistake.

HEY”! He jumped up and tapped her on the shoulder. “DON’T LEAVE YOUR JUNK HERE”.

She looked puzzled, and again she ignored him.

HEY YOU”!  And he takes the paper and shoves it into her hand. “TAKE YOUR GARBAGE WITH YOU”.

AH!  SHE GOT IT!

.....but she left it soon enough.... as she promptly dropped the paper on the floor in the metro station.

I noticed he chose to tell  a small female student and not the guy wearing a hard hat with tattoos covering half his body who also dumped his paper on the seat.  Seems to me our hero had it figured out that he'd save the world as long as it didn't involve losing any teeth.

Old Proverb:  There is no free ride.  Only free papers.  (Or something like that).

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